Our words hold power, power to bring death or power to bring life. Revelation 12:11 states, “They defeated him through the blood of the Lamb and the bold word of their testimony.” Our secrets lose power when they are brought into the light. It is a hard thing to speak the bold word, the secret place, the thing that wants to stay hidden.
Today we have bold, brave words by a guest blogger, Diana Reis, and they are good, good words:
Those that know me well know I don’t usually like to be so bold or put myself out there in this way, but this chapter in the book, Girl Wash Your Face, was so important for me & I feel led to share.
I’d say that since I was pretty young (way too young), I learned to cope with things through drinking. You name it…stress, anxiety, worries, shame, fear, insecurities, boredom, whatever. When things got tough, this was the easiest thing that I could turn to. It was an instant fix to whatever problem I was facing. Trouble in my teen years, have a drink. Need confidence in an uncomfortable situation, have a drink. Challenging changes in my 20’s, have a drink. Failing first marriage, have a drink. Stressed because life has thrown me too much, have a drink. Overwhelming day with the kids, have a drink. Mad because you caved in and “solved your problem” by having drinks, have another drink. (You get the picture). I could always pull myself out of it so it didn’t become too big of a problem…however, when things got to be too much for me, this was my “easy outlet” for many years. It’s crazy too – because when you wake up, those problems and troubles are still there…just slightly worse now because you don’t feel 100% from the night before.
It took me too many wasted years, days, nights and weekends to finally realize this unhealthy path I kept taking myself down. Like she says in this chapter “drinking is so hard to walk away from because the action is just so easy”. The great thing about going through tough stuff is that it builds up your immune system. But if you keep medicating it, you can’t learn how to cope with it…whatever that IT is. “The difficult seasons we walk through are how we learn to build up strength to manage any situation.”
I have learned different and better ways to deal with my stress and anxiety. It wasn’t easy and took a lot of mistakes and failures to get there, but I did. It doesn’t mean I’m perfect now and have it all right. I’m human and still learning every day. I will still make mistakes along the way, but now I have learned that when things feel like they are too much – I can read, pray, run, laugh, exercise, be with friends, have coffee, play with my kids, etc. I finally got tired of how it was affecting so many areas of my life. It’s ok to have a glass of wine and relax…but it doesn’t have to turn into a coping mechanism. “Food, Water, shelter, healthy relationships…those are things we need. Anything else you insert into that category becomes a dangerous crutch – and you don’t need a crutch if you are strong enough to walk on your own. — Fighting through those hard times is how you get tougher; it’s how you become the person you were meant to be.”
I don’t know what struggles you may be dealing with or how you may be negatively coping with it, but for me it was having the self awareness to acknowledge my unhealthy habits I had created for myself. “You’re never going to move past a problem if you can’t even admit to having it in the first place.” Once you can admit it to yourself, remove the temptations from your life. Those can be different for everyone. It can be food, alcohol, phone use, porn, smoking, etc. Create new and positive habits to put in their place. It can be one of the best things you do for yourself. “Obviously real struggles run so much deeper than simply having access, but it’s much easier to fall into those temptations if they’re sitting right in front of you.”
Hopefully me sharing this can help someone else somewhere with something in your own life. Sometimes we just need to remind ourselves of our “why”. My why is: my kids, my husband, my health, my relationship with my Heavenly Father, my friends, my future, my small group students, & my family. What is your why?
Check out the song – “You Say” By: Lauren Daigle